Hi Craig,
My girlfriend for the last 5 years died a few months ago and i have been having a very hard time trying to accept this. We were/are both 27, and to think that the life that we had planned ahead of us will never happen is sometimes too much for me to bear. We had to go through a lot to be together, including having a 2 year long distance relationship and now when things were falling into place, she fell sick unexpectedly and after 2 months of misdiagnosis and treatment she died. I was with her during this period all the way till the end and these memories, of her being sick and suffering sometimes cloud everything that happened before she fell sick.
I have a lot of people around me trying to "heal" me and get me to move on with my life, but i just cant seem to accept what happened. I am not even sure what to move on to as i had pretty much put all my eggs in one basket, so to speak.
I have tried to get some kind of indication from her that she still exsits and that i would see her again one day and for a while after her death i felt her around me but i feel it less and less now a days. Sometimes i felt her around me when i was hurting the most and when i couldnt feel her presense any more i tried to relive the worse memories of her being sick so that i could feel her presense again.
The thought of me having to spend such a long time before i can meet her is almost unbearable. I also feel a trmendous loss for the life that we had planned and tried so hard to have but it will never happen.
I guess i am looking for some kind answer and would appreciate any insight you could give me regarding this.